Let’s talk about failure
…ugh, just saying the word makes me cringe a little. Failure isn’t fun, it’s uncomfortable, disheartening and downright unpleasant. I mean, think about it, to fail means that something didn’t go as intended. You had a specific result that you wanted to see or accomplish, and you missed that mark.
Failure holds so much power over us. There’s that failure of rejection, which makes us hold back and hesitate before really putting ourselves out there. There’s the failure resulting in disappointment or being hurt, which makes us slow to trust others or be completely vulnerable. There’s the failure in coming so close…having little successes along the way to build our confidence, only to come up short in the end – that one often leads to a fear of success. Just the concept of failure can stop us dead in our tracks and negatively impact our success journey.
However, I’ve come to realize that having true success is nearly impossible without having some failure along the way. Failure is often the catalyst of change, for making edits and improvements, and becoming better.
Think of a toddler learning to walk. At first they try to stand and typically topple right over, then eventually, after many failed attempts, they get the hang of it and they’re ready to give walking a try – more failure and falls ensue; but these little ones are determined, and eventually those steps turn into walking, running, climbing and jumping. Just about every professional athlete and/ or dancer has a similar start.
Success isn’t determined by how many times you’ve failed. It all about the times when you fought back and tried again.
“I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” (Michael Jordan)
So how do you prevent yourself from being totally controlled by fear? Embrace it! Go into every project embracing the fact that you might fail. Focus on creating momentum and getting taking action. And when a mistake happens (because it might), embrace it, learn from it and do better. The more you fail, the better you become.
Also, think about the greats. The Michael Jordan quote above is a great reminder that even those individuals who are remembered in history as being “the best”, even they have failed – repeatedly.
When you tackle your next challenge – focus on doing your best and be prepared to make improvements. Don’t even entertain the concept of perfection.
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